Ghosts

Ghosts is Dolly Alderton’s debut novel and a follow-up to her memoir Everything I Know About Love, which sold more than half a million copies and won a UK National Book Award for autobiography in 2018. Published in 2020, Ghosts follows 32-year-old writer Nina Dean as she enters the confusing world of online dating while also managing her father’s progressive dementia. The novel addresses the complexities of a being a modern woman, tackling such themes as Gender Roles in Relationships, How Relationships Change and Evolve, and Being a Caregiver for Someone in Cognitive Decline. Ghosts was a top five Sunday Times Bestseller and named one of the best books of 2020 by NPR, Vogue, and People. Alderton transformed her award-winning memoir into a television series, and Ghosts has been optioned for a film.

This guide references the Penguin Random House 2020 eBook edition.

Plot Summary

Nina Michael Dean is at a crossroads in her life. Though she is a successful food writer, she feels like the clock is ticking to find a partner and start a family. As she watches her friends get married and have children, Nina feels increasingly lonely, so she celebrates her 32nd birthday by downloading a dating app called Linx. She took an extended break from dating after her seven-year relationship with Joe ended, but Nina now feels like she is ready to reenter the dating world. However, things have changed since she last dated, and she relies on her single friend Lola to help her navigate the complex and confusing world of dating apps. Lola, though unlucky in love, remains relentlessly optimistic that she will find a perfect match. However, she has an unhealthy relationship with technology and uses it to track her boyfriends’ movements and online activities.

In addition to the pressure Nina feels to find a partner, she is also processing her father’s dementia diagnosis. Once a vibrant high school teacher and Nina’s hero, Bill Dean is now slipping into cognitive decline and Nina must accept the loss of the father she once knew. Nina’s mother, Nancy, isn’t handling the diagnosis well, and she and Nina clash over how to best care for Bill as his condition progresses. Nina loves her apartment, which she bought by herself, but an Italian man named Angelo moves into the apartment below and disrupts her peace, playing loud music and refusing to put his trash in the proper receptacles. Nina confronts Angelo, but he speaks to her rudely.

Joe, who remains close friends with Nina after their breakup, proposes to his girlfriend, Lucy. Nina struggles to maintain her relationship with her best friend, Katherine, who is married and pregnant with her second child. Nina feels like Katherine looks down on her for still being single.

Nina connects with Max on the dating app, and when they meet in person, Nina falls instantly for his rugged good looks and his attentiveness. After their second date, they move quickly into an exclusive relationship. Despite never meeting his family or any of his friends, Nina is convinced that Max could be the one. One night, after a date, they stumble into Nina’s childhood neighborhood, Albyn Square, and she shares how she wants to raise a family there one day. Max confesses his love for Nina and she responds that she loves him too. However, afterward, Nina doesn’t hear from Max for days. He won’t respond to her texts or phone calls, and when he finally does, it is with a cool detachment that makes Nina feel foolish for badgering him. When all communication goes silent, Nina learns from Lola that she’s been “ghosted,” or dropped from a person’s life with no explanation. Nina tries to go on with her life, but she sinks into a deep depression as her father’s illness worsens and she longs for the comfort of Max’s arms. Lola and Nina attend Lucy’s hen do but feel ostracized as the only single women there, especially when the other guests encourage them to do all they can to attract a partner. While Nina drifts further away from Katherine, her bond with Lola strengthens as Lola supports her after Max disappears.

Nina serves as one of Joe’s ushers at his wedding, and the event is bittersweet as she celebrates Joe’s happiness but is constantly reminded of what she may never have. Without Max, Nina redirects her energy to writing her next book, an exploration of food and its connection to memory. After Katherine’s son is born, Nina goes to visit and the two friends have an explosive fight, after which they stop speaking. Max reenters Nina’s life, explaining that the rapid pace of their relationship frightened him, but that he is now ready to commit. Despite her anger, Nina forgives him, and for a month they fall back into a serious relationship. During a weekend trip, Max and Nina discuss marrying and having children, but they also argue over Max’s career struggles. After they return home, Max ghosts Nina again and this time never returns.

Bill has an accidental fall, and at the hospital Nina and her mother argue but finally agree that they need more help in caring for Bill. One night Katherine shows up drunk at Nina’s apartment and admits she’s struggling to find her footing as a wife and mother. The two promise to work on their friendship going forward. Lola begins a new relationship with a magician named Jethro, and their relationship progresses quickly. Nina continues to have arguments with Angelo and steals his packages in revenge. Finally, he confronts her in her apartment. They have an intense argument but end up having sex. Angelo explains that his girlfriend left him and he misses his home in Parma. They reconcile and agree to be friends.

Jethro ghosts Lola, and Nina confronts him in defense of her friend. Lola wants to jump back into the dating scene and download Linx again, but Nina isn’t certain she is ready and instead resolves to work on her career and spend as much time with Bill as possible. She spends her 33rd birthday in Albyn Square with her parents, Katherine and her family, Joe and a newly pregnant Lucy, and Lola.