What We All Long For

Oku is sitting at a café, looking at a pile of advertisements for shows that Jackie had handed him. He is supposed to be in class, “but that was over for him” (81), as he had dropped out in January. He considers which of the shows he might be able to or willing to attend while thinking about and regretting his parting words.

That morning, he had woken up to his father Fitz’s coughing, as he usually did, and “prepared himself for the morning ritual” (81) of battling with him over the breakfast table. “For a moment” (81) he understands why Jackie called him innocent, as he’s still living at home; however, he tried to move out several years prior, then went back on his decision after his parents’ complaints. He thinks about what his life would be like if he did live on his own: “He would have had friends over day and night, he would have spent hours listening to [Thelonious] Monk and Miles [Davis] […] and, best of all, not had to hear Fitz’s voice each morning” (82).

Fitz doesn’t allow Oku to sleep in later than him, and he spends most mornings at breakfast lecturing Oku on what it means to be a real man and do real work.